i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm both gender and math confused
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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