I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
