Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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