I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
