just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
