The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
they need to just BURY HIM!
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
