is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize