Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
