Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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