eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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