his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize