my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
