More tranny stories later!
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
how drunk are you?
Several
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