I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
