Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
