Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
My dick has a subreddit
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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