Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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