you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
