I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
