i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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