i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
