The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize
