We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Randomize
