My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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