I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
