while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
My vagina is officially offended.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
