i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
