Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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