Screwed.edu
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize