he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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