the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize