Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
only you would photoshop your dick
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
