if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I smell stomach acid.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
