I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
