I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
