Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize