Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
