i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize