i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
