yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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