your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Randomize