I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
