brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Actions speak louder than pants.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
