you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
The air was thick with penises
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
If I die, sorry about rent.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
