if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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