it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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