he wants to bone in the snuggie
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
