Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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