I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
