He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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