The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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